Over the past few weeks I’ve replayed the first Mass Effect and made it about half way through Mass Effect 2. It has cemented them as among my favorite games. Before I shift my focus to next week’s Portal 2 I wanted to share the wealth with anyone who has yet to delve into this fantastic vision of the future.

What’s Mass Effect All About?
In the beginning of the first Mass Effect, humanity is a recent arrival on the the galactic stage. Mankind got there thanks to the discovery of ancient technology from an extinct alien race called the Protheans. The Mass Effect is what makes FTL travel possible. The central hub of galactic civilization is the Citadel, and that is where the most powerful body of inter-species government, The Council, resides. Humanity wants a seat on the council and our chances would be improved if a human could become a Spectre, an agent of the council with incredible autonomy and authority. Commander Shepard is probably mankind’s best candidate.

Who is Commander Shepard?
That’s largely up to you. Shepard is a human, but that’s about all that’s set about the commander. You are free to choose is Shepard is a man or a woman, what kind of upbringing Shepard had, why Shepard is famous and what kind of combat Shepard specializes in. Both Mass Effects are engaging because you are usually free to make your own choice on how to tackle a situation. Your choices are categorized as Paragon or Renegade and if you consistently make choices down one of those paths, you are able to do more. As a Paragon, Shepard is a compassionate hero, always willing to help others and maybe even able to charm his or her way out of some sticky situations. As a Renegade, Shepard is a more intimidating, apathetic and selfish figure, willing to shoot enemies who spend to much time monologue-ing and even betray people for his or her own benefit.

For what it’s worth, choosing to have a background as a spacer war hero will boost your Paragon points at the beginning of the game and choosing to be a ruthless earth-born will boost your Renegade points. To start as neutral as possible, choose to be a sole survivor colonist. Personally, I think the female Shepard voice actor is better as a Paragon and the male actor is better as a Renegade. But most importantly, you should just make Shepard the kind of hero you want to play. You’ll be commanding the commander for quite a while.

What are the Classes?
There are six classes in the Mass Effect games. They are broken into three focuses: combat, tech and biotic abilities. The soldier is pure combat, the only class able to master all the weapons in both games. The engineer is pure tech and which is handy for locked doors and crates in the first game and the ability to summon an attack drone in the second. The adept is pure biotic, able to use powers not unlike those of a Jedi. Lots of throwing people around. The other three classes are mixes of the first three. The infiltrator is a combat and tech specialist and an expert sniper in the second game. The vanguard is a combat and biotics specialist, a master of close combat. The sentinel is a tech and biotics specialist, arguably the most versatile of all the classes.

When I first played through Mass Effect, my Shepard was an infiltrator. I liked that, since I never felt obligated to bring another tech specialist just to unlock crates. I turned that Shepard into a soldier in Mass Effect 2, because I wanted access to all the guns. My second time through both games I played as a vanguard and have been really enjoying it. In Mass Effect 2, vanguards get the ability to charge, which I think is the most fun power in the game, although it takes a bit of skill to use properly. I’ve been told that sentinels and soldiers have the easiest time getting through both games. Once again, you should really just choose what sounds fun to you.

Why Should I Play These Games?
If you like third person shooters, RPGs or engaging stories, both Mass Effect games are worth your time. The first game is like great Star Trek, it builds an amazing new universe that you’ll love to explore and learn about. The second game is like a Star Wars, less focused on the science fiction and more about real drama and an epic story. Except you get to make all the choices.

Both games focus on your ability to assemble a team of misfits to overcome ridiculous odds. They feature a great cast of characters who you will genuinely enjoy getting to know and will make it difficult for you to choose who to bring to a battle, and, eventually, who lives and who dies. I have never enjoyed conversation more in a game than in both of the Mass Effects.

Admittedly, the first Mass Effect has started to show its age, especially if you’ve seen Mass Effect 2. If you have a PS3, that’s a non-issue, since the game never came out on that platform. You get a bonus interactive comic at the beginning of Mass Effect 2 that catches you up and lets you make the critical decisions from the first game. If you’re on Xbox or PC, suck it up, bitch. Get past the technical jank, the bad inventory management, the terrible Mako sections. At the heart of it all, the first Mass Effect is still quite an enjoyable title.

If you’re scared because of the RPG aspects of the games, don’t be. In Mass Effect 2, there basically is no wrong choice you can make, the leveling and inventory systems are so streamlined. More importantly, the combat is great fun, like Gears of War with magical sci fi powers. This isn’t turn-based at all, it’s a straight-up shooter that you could play without ever pausing.

Mass Effect 3 is supposed to come out at the end of this year. You’ve still got time to join me in line on opening night. It’s time you catch up with one of the greatest game series of all time.

Here’s my lengthy retelling of the night I met Kevin Smith. It’s probably littered with errors as I didn’t have the energy to proof-read. I don’t expect anyone to read the whole thing so I hope you enjoy skimming it, snoogans!

It’s still difficult to process everything that went down last Monday. Not only did I get to see the latest Kevin Smith film six months ahead of its release date, but I got to meet Silent Bob himself. How did I get into this situation? Well, it starts like this; my cousin Kyle is the Sr. Manager of Artist Relations at Avid (the company that makes editing software) So since Kevin Smith’s latest flick Red State was made with Avid, Kyle went on tour with the film as a representative. Then a month ago I get an email and Kyle tells me the tour is coming to Seattle’s McCaw Hall. Seeing as my brother and I are both filmmakers in our own way, Kyle not only invites us to the show but also with the promise he can get us into a private Q&A. How private? Six people and that’s including my brother and I.

Monday afternoon I head out to Seattle and through a series of taxis, buses, and a pickup from my cousin, I arrive at the prestigious McCaw Hall. There I get my ticket and fancy shmancy backstage pass, a first in my life. I meet the other film students around the same time with two of them hailing from my former Bellevue College and two others from Vancouver Film School, the school that Kevin Smith himself dropped out of after only a few months. I’m curious as to how this group was assembled, I mean I know why I’m there (I’ve got connections) but what about these film hopefuls? Raffles… Wow, the fact that these students are here due to nothing more than chance? It made me feel kind of guilty, especially since Kyle is the one guiding and instructing all the students regarding the night ahead. Paul arrives about a half hour later after accidentally being taken to Renton by a South African cab driver.

The show is delayed by an hour, so Paul and I see this as the perfect opportunity to do what else… Go to Dick’s Drive-In. Kyle comes with and we all chat about this and that while trying to convince Kyle of the greatness of Dicks Drive-In (He lives in Phoenix, Arizona these days). We head back to McCaw a bit before 8 PM where the 100 year old usher guides us to our seats. Seems strange that everyone that works at McCaw is at least over 75. I guess it’s getting harder and harder to retire in this economy. Our seats are far back but the view is still fairly good, not long after the lights dim and Kevin Smith takes the stage.

I was well aware of Kevin Smith’s reputation as a big talker, so I was prepared for a long night. He introduced the film with a simple enough breakdown, that Red State was loosely based on the Fred Phelps family (a real life group of religious nut-jobs) and that it wasn’t a comedy like Clerks but a horror movie like Jersey Girl. I think it’s great that he has such a great sense of humor about both his failures and successes and after a few more dick jokes he presented us Red State!

Rather than going into detail on the specifics of Red State (I’ll do that in an upcoming review) let me skip ahead. So were watching the movie, which is entertaining (despite what some critics have written) when my cousin taps me on the shoulder. As he points behind me I turn to see who else but Kevin Smith on his laptop sitting behind me. I guess he likes to tweet during screenings of his movies, but it just blew my mind that he could submerge himself into the audience like that, awesome?

So about 85 or 88 minutes later (it was a short movie) Kevin Smith took the stage once again. Naturally, I knew what was coming, the crowd Q&A which I’ve heard can last anywhere from a few minutes to hours, this one had to be at least over an hour. I suppose I’d enjoy this more if I’d been a regular attendee, but remember I get to meet him later, so honestly that’s all I can think about. The questions were typical of Smith’s fans; obscure references, questions about Kevin’s podcasts, and of course the couple of d-bags that see this as an opportunity to network. This included a girl with a comic script and a guy who was like “Dude, I have an Epic camera I could help you on your next movie.” The audience were all sighs and shrugs towards these moments and I was no different, but Smith was always gracious and kind.

After what seemed like an eternity of bizarre yet humorous gabbing the show cleared out, though in a way my night had just begun. All the students gathered as we waited for the go ahead from some guy, I think he was Kevin’s road manager or something? We all talked about the movie as we waited and most of us liked it. I was surprised because I went in ready to hate it and no, my mind wasn’t changed because of the circumstances. I mean sure it was disjointed but it had some big laughs and bigger scares. Finally, we get the green light and head to a small room behind the McCaw Hall stage.

The group (chaperoned my cousin and the guy that works for Kevin) takes us into a room where all the students gather around a table and not long after Kevin arrives and takes a seat across from myself…. and what’s the first thing he says? He looks at my X-Files shirt and says “Oh man that’s an awesome shirt.” Awesome, I mean I knew Kevin Smith was an X-fan, I am too, but the fact that he actually mentioned it? That made my day. So we talk about the episode for a few minutes and then launch into the Q&A. Here’s a brief summarization of the questions.

– “How do you feel about critics sites like Rotten Tomatoes?”
: Naturally Kevin hates stuff like that, even though he has a lot of critic friends. He went on to talk about art films saying “If you’ve made an art film and it gets a 75% you’ve fucked up.” I don’t know about that, but it was a lot of fun to hear his opinions.

– “Can you remember anything negative or positive anyone has said about your filmmaking that has stuck with you?”
Wow, a lot talk about his critics thus far, though it was fun to hear him crack wise about the people who hate his work.

– What’s your stance on film school? “Are we just wasting our money on film school when we should be spending it on our own films?”
: That question was mine and I was glad to hear that Kevin doesn’t consider higher education to be a waste of time, even though he’s a film school dropout. Basically, he talked about how lucky he was and that probably wont happen to everyone, so we should hone our craft and get educated for as long as he can. He feels that it’s a great time to learn things and meet people and there shouldn’t be any rush to make a film as soon as you can. He went on to talk about Denny’s and herpes but for the most part the answer I liked to hear.

Next this girl was like “I noticed in the credits that you didn’t have any women on your camera crew?”
: Wow, rude much? Kevin wasn’t sure as he doesn’t do any the hiring on his films so it was then that his manager/friend/guy/associate spoke up and said, “Yeah we did, Mary, she ran focus.” So c’mon, you have this one opportunity to meet Kevin smith and you start calling him out? What’s up with that?

Personally, I feel I hit it off well, some people are so serious. I was just trying to make him smile, think I did alright. Afterwards he signed autographs and took pictures. I got him to sign a copy of his book “Silent Bob Speaks” to which he lovingly signed “Hey John, I fucking love you.” Classic… And the rest is in the books, thanks for reading if you managed to read the whole thing.

“There’s something a little off about this picture of Kevin and Paul.”

Does anyone remember Death By Hangers? You know that one death metal band from Satanville, Rhode Island? I hear they’re working on a new album and they just released this new song that’s pretty bad. Regardless of whether people want it or not, it’s being made, just thought I’d give you the warning.

P.S. I hear the whole original lineup was murdered by the new lineup. So sorry, no Gregory Ridewood.

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I feel like this post gets harder to write every year. So either I’m getting lazier, or I’m still a little disoriented by all the chocolate cream pie and cream soda.

So another year, another Oscar ceremony in the can and thus my yearly reflection of the night of a thousand stars. To start I thought I’d mention that this year friends and I definitely made an event out of the Oscars. I’m talking snack platters, wings, dip, and even some sweet, sweet, cream pie. Everyone had their ballots and we were ready for laughs and excitement, of which we unfortunately received very little. This could be due in part to many factors, but I’m gonna start with the most evident. I mean I like James Franco and Anne Hathaway as much as the next person, but it takes a certain kind of personality to host the Oscars and tonight we just didn’t get that.

Didn’t the Oscars learn anything after the so-so Hugh Jackman hosting gig? I mean he had a pretty good opening bit, but his lacking comedic skills basically made the rest of the night a forgettable blur. So what did they do the next year? They played it safe and got Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin and the results? It was great! So I guess that means it was the “duo formula” that made it work? Wrong, it’s because they were veteran performers with great comedic chops and you can’t just force that kind of comedic timing out of anyone. I don’t think I laughed once at the forced antics of Franco and Hathaway and almost couldn’t watch all the nervous laughter and dead air. Though even more so I think you can blame this year’s Oscar producers.

Oh yeah the actual nominees… Uh well, I did alright on my picks (about 13 for 24) but there were a few mild surprises. I was surprised by Fincher’s snub, but I could tell early on it was shaping up to be The King’s Speech’s night. I was surprised to see Randy Newman pick up another oscar for Toy Story 3 and Rick Baker nab his seventh makeup oscar for The Wolfman I mean that movie totally sucked, but I’ve always loved Baker’s work.

Hmm, I seem to be drawing a blank but overall it was a bit of a disappointing oscar ceremony. Few too laughs and not enough F-bombs, something to consider for next year I suppose.

Kenneth Mars
1936-2011
What a shocker, I didn’t know he was that old, or that he had cancer, but I guess that’s because he just seemed to keep so busy even into his last years. Yes Kenneth Mars possibly the funniest man to ever impersonate German people has passed on. Famous for his roles in such Mel Brooks classics as Young Frankenstein and The Producers, no one could play an over-the-top foreigner like Kenneth Mars and yet he was American, comedic genius.

Though the previously mentioned are possibly his most notable works, Mars had countless roles in notable films including; Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, What’s Up Doc?, Radio Days, The Little Mermaid and many TV roles, including; Gunsmoke, Get Smart, Freakazoid, Deep Space Nine and Batman the Animated Series to name a few.

Personally I’ll always remember him in my favorite performance of his as oblivious German Rancher/Francis’ boss Otto Mankuser on seasons 4 and 5 of Malcolm in the Middle. He was easily one of the funniest characters on the show and will be sorely missed.

The moment has finally come for Strokes fans, what do you call Strokes fans? “Strokers”? That sounds bad. Anyways, today marks the official release of the first single “Under Cover of Darkness”. Available for free download on their site for the next 48 hours or so, though I’d recommend just checking it out on Youtube, unless you want to sign up for a Strokes’ newsletter. To save you some time I’ll post this video of the new single right here, easy breezy beautiful.

As for the song itself, I like it. Bright and cheery like “Someday”, but still retaining some of the complexity of First Impressions of Earth, which could either be a good or bad sign. The interplay between guitarists Nick Valensi and Albert Hammond Jr. is definitely stands out, showcasing a kind of classic rock feel. Word on the street is that the new album Angles (Due out March 22) is supposed to be a return to the sounds of Is This It? Hard to say if The Strokes can ever capture that kind of lightning again, but this track is a good start.