T3 82: Top 10 Breakfast Cereal Brands

We live in a caffein culture in which real breakfasts are ignored by pretty much everybody in favor of tasty desserts that go well with coffee. But before now, in the past, we were younger people who liked something different. Something a little more… straight-up sugary. Join us this week as we literally and figuratively dip our spoons into the deep bowl of childhood by figuring out our 10 favorite breakfast cereal brands. But can we see why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch?

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Shocktober Day 22: Orca

Orca (1977)

Jaws is a landmark film. It was the film that started the idea of the summer blockbuster. A film so successful the market was instantly flooded with countless knockoffs, one of which Shocktober explored yesterday with Colin’s review of Kingdom of the Spiders. Why did everyone want to make the next Jaws? Because Jaws showed all you needed was some colorful characters and an animal threat and you could make infinite money.

Orca may not have been the most egregious of these knockoffs–that title belongs to the 1981 pile of Italian schlock Great White, a movie Universal sued into oblivion–but Orca is up there. That being I said, I do sense Orca has something else driving it. A film in search of an identity, but unfortunately it could never swim away from what it truly was a big, wet, salty, knockoff.

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Shocktober Day 21: Kingdom Of The Spiders

Kingdom Of The Spiders (1977)

This may sound crazy, but I was pretty disappointed by this movie.  I know, I know.  How could I possibly have any sort of high hopes for a post-Star Trek William Shatner in a B-movie in which he fends off an army of tarantulas?  Well, I think that premise sums it up pretty well, but basically I thought the combination of Shatner’s histrionics with such inherent trash would make for a campy good time.  But instead this movie is pretty unsatisfying, pretty melodramatic (in all the worst ways), and doesn’t feature nearly enough Shatner-rage. Continue reading

Shocktober Day 20: The Exorcist II: The Heretic

The Exorcist II: The Heretic (1977)

I don’t know who sat down and watched The Exorcist and said “That was fun! Let’s have some more of that” but they should probably burn in Hell. I’ve always found it surprising that there are enough exorcism movies to form an entire subgenre. What else can an exorcism movie be but someone in a bed screaming and making scary faces?

According to The Exorcist II: The Heretic it can be many other things, as long as none of those things are good. Even after watching this film I’m still not sure what it’s about or why it was made. Wait, what am I talking about? I know why it was made: M-O-N-E-Y, which in a way is the scariest thing of all #truth.

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Shocktober Day 19: The Sentinel

The Sentinel (1977)

In another half-assed “gotta-get-a-review-in-every-day” effort I present you with the 1977 supernatural horror flick The Sentinel. The film was directed and adapted for the screen by Michael Winner, a man who I can assume never fails at anything. I first discovered The Sentinel through the Holy Bible of Horror Cinema also known as Bravo’s 100 Scariest Movie Moments. I’m not sure I would of heard of this Exorcist wannabe if not for that immortal Bravo mini-series but I do see some of the appeal. The film is a little bit The Exorcist, a little bit Rosemary’s Baby and a little bit The Omen. But is it as good? Let’s find out.

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Shocktober Day 18: Eraserhead

Eraserhead (1977)

When John offered me the chance to revisit Eraserhead for this year’s Shocktober, I jumped at the chance much more so I could watch it rather than actually write about.  Because even from the one experience I had watching Eraserhead back in high school, which was on some streaming site (probably in like 240p), I found that watching Eraserhead is an experience unlike any other.  The film is atmospheric, unsettling, and one of the most truly bizarre American films ever made.  But because it is a film that is so uniformly abstract, and so entrenched in mood and feeling rather than the conventions we usually associate with most movies, it’s hard to wrap any sort of words around what exactly this batshit film is.  But I’ll see what I can do. Continue reading

Shocktober Day 17: House

House (1977)

In a last minute substitution, I present you with the Japanese take on the old haunted house formula with Nobuhiko Obayashi’s 1977 cult favorite House. Inspired by Jaws out of all things, Obayashi wanted to capture that same level of creativity and entertainment while simulatenously breathing new life into an already decrepit subgenre. Where did he find his inspiration? Why his pre-teen daughter Chigumi of course. Who better to dream up nightmares than an innocent child? But what could a child possibly bring to the table that we haven’t already seen? How about a house that eats people? Or maybe killer furniture? How about watermelons turning into heads? House has all of this and much, much more.

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