How to Train Dragons and Influence People

How to Train Your Dragon

Well, I guess I should start this review by saying I had no idea there was a book behind this movie. From what I’ve read on Wikipedia, the plot of the original book has little in common with the film How to Train Your Dragon, so I don’t think that puts me at a disadvantage. But I’m not reading that book regardless.

This film tells the story of Hiccup, a wimpy but brainy viking in a village of dragon-hunters. His incompetence has always made him an outcast, but that all begins to change when he befriends Toothless, the rarest and most powerful of all dragons, and discovers the truth about dragons. Hiccup is played by Jay Baruchel, who is having quite the year for seemingly no reason. The cast also features Gerard Butler and Craig Ferguson, who go full on Scottish, and some more comedians, who don’t.

Anyway, this movie is definitely the good Kung Fu Panda-Shrek 1-Dreamworks CG adventure people older than five can actually enjoy. I’d say it’s probably even bordering Pixar quality. That’s because so much of what works in this movie is told through the animation, especially the big eyes of the dragons. Toothless is pretty much Dreamworks’ WALL-E, and though he’s not even close to that compelling, they’re certainly on the right track.

The reason to see this movie is for the action. There are some fun dragon battles and a couple great flying sequences. The 3D is nice, but I’m not sure you have to see it that way. How to Train Your Dragon actually has a lot in common with Avatar: the outcast befriends his supposed enemies, rides the best dragon, and ultimately saves the day. And just like Avatar, it’s fun to watch. Do with that what you will.

The Vault: Bart’s Nightmare/Prince of Persia

Still fighting to make this a recurring segment someday, maybe it could even be on one of our sidebars? So this means I recently made a visit to “Amazing Heroes” which for those who don’t know is a vintage video game/toy store in Totem Lake. You can just smell the nostalgia and overwhelming nerdiness when you walk in. So this time I picked up a new copy of Resident Evil: Code Veronica but I haven’t played it yet so I won’t review and two sega games. Both games have connections to my past and both were uhh well… Interesting.

Bart’s Nightmare (1992)

The Scoop: A tie-in to the classic 90s T.V. Show, Bart’s Nightmare follows Bart as he wanders through a strange dreamworld collecting homework and playing bizarre “Nightmare” mini-games.

Why?: This is one of those games I sucked at as a kid so I thought I’d give it another whirl. Unfortunately I’m not much better and still a little confused by what you’re supposed to do. You spend most of the game wandering down a weird street collecting homework that takes you to the mini-games but they’re so random. There’s also this sleep meter I still don’t get, I’ll definitely be doing some research on the interweb.

Pros: The mini-games although difficult are awesome. You got “Bartzilla”, “Indiana Bart”, “Bart vs. Itchy and Scratchy”, “Bartman” and some game where you’re fighting germs in someone’s blood stream. They can be a little repetitive but they’re all clever and entertaining

Cons: It’s too hard and occasionally confusing. Not to mention that the “non mini-game” gameplay is pretty boring.

Prince of Persia (1989)

The Scoop: Long before the fancy slow-mo filled game and Jake Gyllenhaal movie there was this classic PC platformer, considered to be quite advanced for the time.

Why?: I used to have it on our old Macintosh and although it was damn difficult, I somehow have fond memories. I didn’t even know there was a Sega version and well, it was two bucks! TWO BUCKS!

Pros: Okay graphics for the time I guess and it’s a clever little game.

Cons: Oh my god this is impossible! The controls are so bad that I can barely play it. This could be great if everything wasn’t delayed, plus you’re timed. Could my memories be playing tricks on me?

T3: Return of the King… Of Monsters

(This is not related to April Fool’s Day)
For anyone who religiously follows IMDb or any kind of movie site you’ve probably heard that Legendary Pictures recently purchased the rights to Godzilla. Working closely with Japanese Producers, a 2012 release date has been set for a new installment. Seeing that the last American Godzilla was so untrue to the character here are my thoughts on what would make a new Godzilla movie actually worth watching.

No particular order here just a few of my suggestions.

10. Set it in Japan
Godzilla is to Japan like Ford Trucks are to America. He’s one of the most identifiable characters of Japanese Pop Culture so keep him in his own neck of the woods. It just won’t be Godzilla if he’s not puttin’ the smack-down on Osaka.

9. 3D You Wanna See
I’ve been a little weary about all this unnecessary 3D lately but this is one that’s got to have 3D and it better be damn good. I’m tired of all these last minute cash-ins so this better have damn good 3D, like Beowulf good. BEOWULF!!!

8. Seeing Stars
You don’t want to weigh this down with too many stars. Big name celebs could detract from our main focal point which is the monster himself. I’d prefer to see maybe one star with a cast of asian character actors but it doesn’t seem likely.

7. I Have the Power!
Remember how in the American version Godzilla didn’t have any powers? That sucked, you got to have his atomic breath or fire blast attacks. That stuff is beyond bad-ass, I don’t care if it doesn’t make sense nothing about Godzilla makes sense so have fun with it.

6. No Hide and Seek
I don’t want any trailers of Godzilla’s foot or just his tail like the advertising campaign for the 98′ American version. I want to know right off the bat what we got here. I want to be reassured that Godzilla will look like Godzilla, alright?

5. Homage
Wow it’s hard to come up with ten of these. So this one is basically to make sure it pays it’s respects to the original series. You know through little hints and details maybe use the Toho logo, though I’m not clear on their evolvement. Little comedic touches and stuff that most people wont notice but others will greatly appreciate.

4. Traditional Tunes
You got to love Akira Ifukube’s iconic theme and if that’s not in this movie somewhere, someone is about to get straight up murdered.

3. Period Piece
Not Really important and probably fairly unlikely would be to set this in the 1950s. Personally I’d love to see a retro look, plus you could still use the original origin story. I’ve always loved how the original tied Godzilla into the whole aftermath of the A-Bomb droppings. I’d love to see that revisited somehow.

2. Original Recipe
If I can recall one of the first things to piss people off about the 98′ Godzilla was that Godzilla looked like an Iguana. Why change him so dramatically? He already looks awesome so why did they do that? All I can think of is that they wanted him to look more believable (which is already ridiculous.) Or to design him so that he could run and swim faster but who cares about his speed? He’s like a hundred feet tall is that not enough? So let’s keep him traditional, no need for another Jurassic Park knockoff.

1. One Monster to Rule Them All
: As much as I’d love to see all of Godzilla’s classic foes back on the silver screen you got to start it simple. We don’t know how well this could work so why not start out with just the G-man? I know it doesn’t sound too exciting but you don’t want to overwhelm everybody with a bunch of other shit right off the bat. If it’s good you can always work your way up to other monsters. Though there’s always the outside chance they can make it work with two monsters… Only time can tell.

For the most part I’m optimistic I mean it’s Godzilla after all. Personally I didn’t even hate the U.S.’ Godzilla though I was disappointed with a lot of the changes they made. So can the same company behind The Dark Knight revitalize the King of the Monsters? As long as there’s no “Baby Godzillas” I’ll be happy.

Da Morgue Dot Org 2.0

Well, after a couple weeks of not so much posting. I thought I’d step up and get the ball rolling. And there’s no better way to do that than be redesigning the site. I think this new look is really bold, introducing the festivity we generate wherever we go while maintaining professionalism.

I expect to keep this design for a long time, as I obviously spent hours working on it over the past few weeks. So get used to it.