Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt

I’m sure by now you’ve already binged your way through this and moved on to the next all-you-can eat TV buffet. Bloodline, maybe? That being said, we love to L-O-L here at Mildly Pleased so I think we have a responsibility to at least say something about Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt. Not to mention there’s been talk of an upcoming Podcast with the prompt: “Top Ten Sitcoms Characters We’d Like to Hang Out With”. Who knows? Maybe someone from this breakout Netflix hit will be a part of that conversation. Or should I call it a “un-breakout” hit? I shouldn’t.

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It Follows

“Put one foot in front of the other and soon you’ll be walking ‘cross the floor. Put one foot in front of the other and soon you’ll be walking out the door.” Never did I think this concept could be used for pure evil. Now it has. It Follows is the breakout horror hit from writer/director David Robert Mitchell and like the best horror films it learns that all you need is a little to scare a lot. In this case, it’s a simple premise, so simple that it’s amazing that no one has ever done it. A sexually transmitted haunting that follows you until you pass it on. Only you and the previous carrier can see It. It can look like anyone, sometimes even people you know, and if you are killed by It it is then passed back to the previous carrier. The whole idea feels like an urban legend we were all told as kids to scare us away from sex, but in this movie its real and it’s coming.

The film “follows” Jay (Maika Monroe), an attractive teenage girl living in the suburbs with her group of friends who do nothing but lay about and watch old horror movies. “It” comes into play after Jay goes on a date with Hugh (Jake Weary) only to find herself chloroformed and tied to a chair after their act of passion. Hugh explains everything I listed above and lets her go. Leaving the curse as her ball and chain to carry, one with a short chain too.

What It Follows does best is take what we normally regard as “safe moments” and instill them with fear. What I mean is that in most horror movies you can usually tell when the scary parts are going to happen and when the not scary parts are going to happen. For most horror films “night = scary, while day = safe.” It Follows does not follow these same rules. For It Follows any time of day is scary and anyone around you can be scary. The feeling of dread when you see someone walking towards you in the distance, not sure if they’re coming for you, only to find out they are. It’s those surprising moments, heightened by musician Disasterpeace’s ‘80s inspired score, that make the film stand from the rest of the crowd.

I give It Follows props for its unique premise, but that doesn’t mean it is completely invulnerable to cliches. Probably the biggest one is character logic. Though I did like the cast and appreciated that they weren’t annoying, screaming douchebags saying “dude” every other line, they make a lot of bad decisions. “Hmm, I’m scared. Where should I hide?” How about a swing set at creepy park near the woods at night?” Or how about, “I’ve been driving for so long, where should I rest? How about the hood of my car in the woods?” You could at least sleep INSIDE the car.

Other minor complaints were that the film relied a little too heavily on its score. I would have loved to see more scenes of “It” simply trudging along in silence, it would have been nice to get that contrast. Also the jump scares. I understand that horror films, especially quiet horror films need jump scares, but at least make the scare mean something. A red ball hitting a window so that it can make a “thump” is lazy. If that’s the best scare you can come up with in that scenario you’re not thinking hard enough.

One more thing, I don’t know what this film is trying to say. Myself and my colleagues Mr. Lemme and Mr. Wessman talked about this after watching this movie. Is this saying something about teen pressure to have sex? STDS? Rape? Maybe it’s nothing, which is fine. Though I do feel like there’s some untapped potential here. I would have loved to see more hints toward a deeper meaning to give the film more substance. This doesn’t necessarily hurt the film, it’s merely a suggestion.

Overall, I’d say It Follows is definitely better than your typical modern horror film. It’s original, scary enough, certainly stylish, and was assembled by a solid cast and crew. Hopefully success can follow David Robert Mitchell with his next project instead of catching up to him and boning him to death. Otteni out.

The Decemberists- What a Terrible World, What a Beautiful World

How could you ever grow weary of turn of the century tunes about press gangs and infanticide? Whether you’re picking out the perfect flannel to go with your civil war beard or sinking your teeth into a vegan artisan donut, The Decemberists have been there as the consummate hipster folk band of this era. I could imagine the old timey gimmick has gotten a little too old for some. Everyone in this band is pushing forty and yet still sound like pretentious Lit majors. Nonetheless, I still find the folksy approach as charming as a makeshift birdhouse. Which is impressive considering I’ve probably heard this album over twenty times (not always willingly).

What a Terrible World, What a Beautiful World just so happens to be one of the albums that has been on constant shuffle for two months now at the Barnes & Noble where I work. I know this album from front to back, with the exception of track 3 which doesn’t work on the store copy. On my first listen about twenty shifts ago, my reaction was that Decemberists album no. 7 was taking on more than it could chew. The first three tracks all build to epic rock crescendos with big brass sections and choruses of singing children. The album then takes an odd u-turn with the understated lead single “Make You Better” in the cleanup spot. It’s followed by an even slower, contemplative song, and then a softer than soft acoustic number. From here on out the album goes back and forth between styles, all somewhat similar but not enough to be cohesive.

I think back to The Decemeberists last album The King is Dead. That album was all folksy Americana and it worked. The one before that, The Hazards of Love, was all over the top rock opera stuff, and it worked. What this new album is isn’t as clear in sound or in lyrical content. There are emotional love songs, songs about the south, sea shanties, it’s all over the place. My suggestion? Stick to a path and follow it.

What I haven’t addressed is when when this album wants to work it does. “Make You Better” feels the most natural with its moody guitar and school boy delivery from Colin Meloy. Meanwhile, “The Wrong Year” is everything I could ever want in a Decemberists song; a relaxed tempo, sensitive lyrics, accordion, bada bing, bada boom. As for the rest, there’s some perfectly acceptable moments but as a whole this feels more like an iTunes playlist than an album. Like a drunk fan put together a mashup of different Decemberists songs from the past fifteen years. Don’t get me wrong, I like it fine, but I see so more potential here. I think The Decemberists still have great albums in them, this one just happens to be a good one.

But what do I know? If you haven’t already heard this, then by all means, put on some flannel, get a coffee, get an artisan vegan donut, dunk ‘n dip, and let it all soak it in.

Favorite Tracks: “Calvary Captain,” “Make You Better,” “The Wrong Year”

John Carpenter – Lost Themes

John Carpenter is old. My estimates put the filmmaker at somewhere between 80 and 80,000 years of age. Wikipedia says “67” but Wikipedia is written by liars. (I’d know, I read that on Wikipedia.) Of course you and I know John Carpenter as the director behind such classic films as the 2001 sci-fi flick Ghosts of Mars and for his 1979 made-for-TV movie about Elvis. Clearly, the man has accomplished a lot, so why record an album? Because with age comes wisdom and with wisdom comes the ability to use computers and with the ability to use computers comes the ability to program and play synths and beats, it’s the natural progression.

The album begins just as you’d expect any Carpenter movie to begin; a wandering melody from a machine that most likely doubles as a Colecovision, a haunted piano, and a simple, hypnotic rhythm. Though it only takes 45 seconds to remind you that John Carpenter is old. To clarify, I’m talking about the fact that Carpenter, who now looks like the ghost of Albert Einstein, doesn’t always make the most “hip” selections when it comes to choosing his synth voices. 45 seconds into track 1, “Vortex”, there’s a synth that distinctly sounds like something from a Sega X-Men video game. There’s a charm there for sure, but it also sounds incredibly cheesy. Almost as cheesy as if Wolverine fought a helicopter… But that will never happen, right?

Many other tracks on “Lost Themes” (not a soundtrack to the TV show by the way), make similar mistakes. Far too often are awesome melodies executed with not so awesome instruments. Though when this does work, holy shit, it works. “Fallen” sounds like something straight from that iconic Kurt Russell/John Carpenter film. No, not the 1979 made-for-TV film Elvis, that one with the eye patch. The album’s closing track, “Night”, is another standout. I find Carpenter is at his best when he keeps things simple. The less weird shit he tacks on the better the track.

I hear Carpenter collaborated with his son to do Lost Themes, which makes sense, the old timer probably needed someone to teach him how to use modern technology, like the internet. Carpenter’s music sensibilities may be dated, but that’s part of the fun of Lost Themes. Listening to these droning melodies and beats is like listening to the soundtrack to the long lost Carpenter movie. Let’s all hope it has Kurt Russell too.

Favorite Tracks: “Fallen,” “Night,” “Obsidian”