Top 10 GameCube Games

I’ve been playing Resident Evil 5 lately, which reminds me a lot of Resident Evil 4. Which made me think of Nintedo’s last console. Well, I’ve done SuperNES and N64, and the GameCube has been dead for a while, so why don’t we dust off that old handled box and look back at the games that defined Nintendo’s worse console generation.


10. Soul Calibur II
While this game was released on all three consoles, the GameCube version was the one to get. Why? Because Namco decided to give each version of the game an exclusive character. XBox got Spawn (for reasons unknown), PS2 got Heihachi (since Tekken was a PlayStation game) and GameCube got Link. That was so cool! They then went on to make Soul Calibur III a PS2 exclusive that was focused on character creation and then Soul Calibur 4 came out for PS3 and 360 with Darth Vader and Yoda as console exclusives. But lightsaber vs. sword doesn’t really make sense, does it?

9. Viewtiful Joe
Now this was a neat little game. You play as the plucky, comic book-style super hero who goes through movies to save (what else) his lady. What set Viewtiful Joe apart was its time-control gameplay, where you could beat up dudes in fast forward or slow down to dodge attacks. It was pretty sweet. It was also crazy hard. It eventually got a sequel and a Smash Bros.-ish game, then the series faded away. But we’ll always has that first game.

8. Super Mario Sunshine
Frankly, I was never too big on this game. I mean, when I’m rolling Mario, I wanna smash some fellas, not clean up their mess. But a Mario game is still a Mario game, and this title does not disappoint. Well, it kind of does. That camera was a little tricky. But the platforming was strong and the game was pretty to look at. Good times.

7. Pikmin 2
Wouldn’t it be nice if they made another Pikmin game? They were so fun. You play as Captain Olimar, a little astronaut dude who crash lands on a strange planet inhabited by weird creatures called pikmin. He exploits those colorful, little plant people to repair his ship or something. I can’t really remember. Oh, and the reason I chose Pikmin 2 over the first game was because that’s the one that I owned.

6. Star Wars Rogue Squadron II: Rogue Leader
Gotta have some Star Wars up on this bitch. I remember going over to Remy’s house and playing this game and being blown away by the graphics. It still looks pretty good. The only problem is those damn tie fighters are fucking hard to see in space. You need to use that targeting computer like the whole time. No wonder it was such a big deal when Luke switched it off in the Death Star trench. The sequel technically is better, since, I mean, it includes all of Rogue Leader as multiplayer. But it just didn’t make the impact this game did.

5. Eternal Darkness: Sanity’s Requiem
This is the cult classic of the console. The one no one played. The one the people who did play it treat like its the best thing ever. This game is all about creeping you out, and it does a pretty dman good job of it. Nothing will be as legendary as when it pranks you into thinking your memory card is corrupted. That’s messed up, dude. If you get the chance, check this one out.

4. The Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker
Link’s a kid again! He’s also a cartoon. And remember that sweet ocarina you had a couple games ago. Gone. Now you get to conduct the wind. And ride around on a talking lion ship. Wind Waker looked great, played great, and got grately confusing when you had to go exploring. The sea is big!

3. Super Smash Bros. Melee
One of those games that I can’t even imagine how many hours of my life I spent on. That first Smash game was so fun, and this game fucking kicked everything into overdrive. A much bigger roster. A sweet adventure mode. Tons of challenges to complete. Awesome. This game was so much fun, when the sequel came out a year ago my friends realised they didn’t like video games anymore.

2. Metroid Prime
To date the only Metroid game I’ve beaten. I had to buy a GameCube so I could play this game. First-person action quite unlike anything I’ve ever played. Now, sure, the backtracking might wear you out, but that’s what GameFAQs is for. The second game was probably better, but, like Rogue Leader, it would be impossible to match the impact this first title made. I mean, before this, Metroid was an exclusively side scrolling series. What a revolution!

1. Resident Evil 4
Remember that chainsaw controller I talked about a while ago? This is the game that goes with it. RE4 pretty much revolutionized how third-person shooters are played. It is the one responsible for putting the player on the side of the screen like that. It invented pressing a button to zoom in and aim. It had quick time events back when it was still cool. Seriously, RE4 is an incredible game, whether you play it on the Cube, PS2 or Wii. Just get it.

C.A.T: Roger the Engineer


The Yardbirds – Roger the Engineer (1966)

Hearing “Over, Under, Sideways, Down” in Observe and Report last weekend got me back into this 60s classic, often considered to be this band’s best work. A unique spin on the blues Roger the Engineer takes basic progressions and adds hints of psychedelia perfected by the excellent experimental guitar work of Jeff Beck.

The Yardbirds have had some great guitar players in their ranks with Eric Clapton and Jimi Page but it’s my opinion that it’s Jeff Beck’s tenure that made the group what they were. Sure you can’t count out the presence and swagger of lead singer Keith Relf or the rest of the band but it was with Beck’s virtuoso guitar playing that the group enjoyed the most commercial success.

“Over, Under Sideways, Down” was the obvious hit off the album and why not? It’s got a great riff, shouting, and overall high energy. Every song here is a frenzy of quick rhythms and tight grooves and truly creative musicianship. Jeff Beck’s dabbling into distortion is always engrossing and his skill here is through the roof. Just check out a song like “Jeff’s Boogie” and you can see how he earned the reputation as one of the great blues/rock guitarists of the 60s and 70s.

Paul Samwell-Smith takes on an ambitious venture producing alongside his usual bass duties. While everyone else nicely fills their roles as well. Roger the Engineer is a definite standout for this band being that it’s their only album with all original material. Unfortunately this would be the last album to feature bassist Paul Samwell-Smith and although the addition of guitarist Jimi Page would give the band an amazing guitar duo in Page and Beck, this would prove to be short lived and with the firing of Beck in late 1966 the group’s “Golden Era” was arguably over.

So if your a fan of the blues but find yourself wanting a different approach to the genre than this is your album. It incorporates a vast amount of influences from all over the world and it’s overall sound is the bee’s knees.

Favorite Tracks: “Jeff’s Boogie”, “Over, Under Sideways, Down”, “Turn Into Earth”

Monster Squad


Monsters vs. Aliens

Happy Easter! Well it’s the weekend of movie reviews huh? To answer your first question I saw this because my mom was dying to see something in 3D. You see when we went to Coraline her glasses (Not her 3D glasses) were broken making most of the film a blur so we went to check out this. Sure I’m not the target audience and a lot of the jokes are juvenile but I enjoyed myself and the 3D was impressive.

Susan Murphy (Reese Witherspoon) is our central character awaiting her wedding day to a smug weatherman (Paul Rudd) when who would’ve thunk it, she’s hit by a meteorite. It’s then that she becomes a giant and must be sent to a top secret prison facility headed by an energetic military general (Kiefer Sutherland) and containing other monsters including; a slow witted blob B.O.B. (Seth Rogen), an amphibious ape/fish aka “The Missing Link” (Will Arnett), a mad mutant scientist Dr. Cockroach (Hugh Laurie) and some giant mindless insect creature “Insectasaurus.” All these colorful creatures are hidden away from society until an evil alien Gallaxhar (Rainn Wilson) decides to invade Earth and seek out the meteor that initially hit Susan Murphy for some reason.

The story here clearly borrows heavily and pays tribute to 1950s B-movies and that’s always nice to see in any modern movie. It’s imaginative and definite eye candy but is still hindered by its childishness. Yeah I get it, it’s for kids but Pixar has managed to find an excellent middle ground while Dreamworks still struggles. Some of the jokes just make you roll your eyes like “Oh yeah that’s really funny”. Fortunately you can always depend on a few of those jokes meant for adults. For instance when the film’s president (Stephen Colbert) approaches a giant robotic probe he goes up to a keyboard to tries to communicate by playing a weak rendition of the Close Encounters melody. How many little kids would get that? Of course they expand the joke with him playing the Beverly Hills Cop theme but how many kids know that? That’s the kind of stuff I look for and luckily it didn’t skimp on that.

I can’t think of weak performer in the entire voice cast. Sometimes I forget how zany Hugh Laurie can be due to House. People have to remember that he started his career in British comedy on shows like Rowan Atkinson’s Blackadder. I thought Stephen Colbert wouldn’t be that funny but he had his moments and Kiefer really does an excellent mad general voice (he did the same voice on an episode of The Simpsons.)

So there were times when I felt embarrassed viewing this but I’m not gonna lie it was entertaining. I’ve always loved 3D and here it’s some of the best I’ve seen since Beowulf which still reigns king in my book… That’s 3D wise not movie wise cause Beowulf kind of sucked.

The World Needs a F**king Hero

Observe and Report

Seth Rogen can draw me into basically anything (well maybe not Horton Hears a Who) and in Observe and Report he more or less takes on his most bizarre character yet. Written and directed by Jody Hill who’s responsible for the movie The Foot Fist Way and the TV show Eastbound and Down (Which I highly recommend) introduces us to yet another rude and testosterone fueled egomaniac in the form of bipolar mall cop Ronnie Barnhardt. In what’s been called Paul Blart’s evil twin, Observe and Report gives Hill yet another venue to display his warped sense of humor covering subjects ranging from rape, to murder, to everything in between.

Detailing the story of a man’s mission to stop an anonymous mall flasher, Observe and Report is a no holds bar 80 something minutes of extreme vulgarity, violence and even a little romance. The jokes can tend to wander from time but the story is actually pretty involving. Will Ronnie ever stop the flasher? Will Ronnie ever make something of himself? Will he find true love? These were plot devices that kept me interested and somehow managed to tie up everything all the way to it’s highly satisfying finale.

From what I’ve seen from Jody Hill thus far I think he does his best work when writing with Danny McBride and Ben Best (both of whom have roles in the film). There’s definitely some great lines in Observe but there were plenty of missed opportunities with the idea and for that I think Hill’s solo script struggles. Even if it does drag at moments you can always depend on Observe and Report’s talented cast to breathe some life and energy into the material. Seth Rogen is perfectly suited for the demented protagonist and he’s in good company. Michael Peña, who’s primarily known for his dramatic roles is excellent as Ronnie’s rowdy “right hand man” and I must give kudos to Anna Farris for her willingness to demean herself with such a trashy character. You throw in a veteran like Ray Liotta and you have a formula for success, or at least some kind of mad experiment.

Observe and Report is really out there. So much that I still have no idea how I feel about it. I like it but how much I’m not sure. There were some great scenes and I can’t remember the last time I laughed so hard at the climax of a comedy, so that must stand for something. I can’t stress enough that this movie is “not for everyone”. It’s sick, strange and highly unconventional but it’s original and I can’t wait to see what sick world Jody Hill introduces us to in his next film.

P.S. After the movie A.J. and my dad got in a heated debate. A.J. thinks There Will Be Blood will go down as this generation’s Citizen Kane… Hmm, awkward what do you think?

Shoot Your Childhood in the Face

Dragonball Evolution

Well, I did it. I bit the bullet and saw Dragonball Evolution. I know, it’s weird, right? Like, it doesn’t feel real. How could this movie not only really exist, but be out there in theaters? Well, it’s time to face facts and see what this little bastard is all about.

Basically you’ve got this scawny white teenage, Goku, who lives with his Asian grandfather, Gohan. Now Goku is “special,” in that he is a very talented fighter. Which makes him different. I guess. It’s a little vague. Anyway, one day Gohan gives Goku this thing called a dragonball. It turns out there’s this bad dude Piccolo who wants those balls so he and his buddy Oozaru can destroy the planet. On his journey to stop Piccolo, Goku meets Bulma, the badass gunfighter, Chi Chi, a fellow “special” fighter, Master Roshi, the man who trained Gohan, and Yamcha, the loveable rogue.

First, I guess I should just address this as a film. It is a failure. Not a complete failure, more like one of those movies that gets a lot wrong but you could still kind of laugh at it. The effects are competent, the story largely makes sense for what it is, and the performances are goofy bad. Poor Chow Yun Fat. I guess if you were a baby who hadn’t seen Dragonball yet, this could be kind of fun.

But here’s the problem, this isn’t just another action movie. This is the Hollywood Dragonball movie everyone’s been clamering for for about a decade now. In that regard, it is the most gargantuan failure I’ve ever seen. It’s like the people working on this barely had any idea what the show was like. Maybe they read about it, but I doubt they saw any of the show or actually read the manga. The similarities are in name only.

Justin Chatwin is easily the worst cast member of the crew. He’s puny. He’s white. He’s somewhat smart-alecy. It’s not just his performance, the character written here is not Goku at all. This is a character that goes to school and has to deal with the jocks calling him “Geeko.” He’s concerned about getting the girl and fitting in. That’s not what Goku is like! What makes Goku a great leading character is his purity, for fuck’s sake! All he cares about is making himself stronger. Oh my God, he’s like the Japanese Superman.

The story here is just nothing like Dragonball, save for the vague similarities in character roles. And I guess the dragonballs do the same thing. I just find it really frustrating. The execution is so horrible. The film opens with a narrator setting up the history of the dragonballs (which is completely different from the Dragonball I know). Then, about halfway through the movie, Master Roshi makes the exact same speech while creating the exact same special effects in a fire! What the fuck is that! How can they get away with that!

You’d think at least the fighting would be fun to watch. Nope. There are only a few fight scenes and they lack any tension or excitement. They’re relatively boring. The final battle is like 15 seconds long and it’s just dude throwing special effects at each other. That’s another thing that bothered me. They completely changed what ki is, which I guess should be expected from something written by an idiot. But they also changed the motions of the kamehameha to make it lamer. What the fuck is up with that? Is there anything more iconic that the kamehameha? Why would you change that? What were they thinking?

In closing, this is a movie where a character says, “DBE, catchy.” Really? You have to tell us the initials of the movie are catchy? You know, now I get why Stephen Chow distanced himself from this project. Because he probably could have made it work. But instead we got one of the most infuriating, lame pieces of shit I’ve ever seen.

I honesltly believe Dragonball could have been made into an acceptable live action movie. Probably would be easier to do Dragonball Z, since that’s more sci fi and a lot more violent. But this is about as far from the mark as a human could get.

Sean’s Top 10s of 2000

Here’s a fun little monthly feature I thought I’d take up in the wake of T3’s death. As we all know, 2009 marks the end of the first decade of the 21st Century. This requires much celebration, and I’m sure by the end of the year we’ll be writing top ten lists of the decade, along with for 2009. But I’ve only been making top tens for the past couple years. To make up for this lack of representation, I thought I’d do those lists now, posting one a month until I’m all caught up. So let’s go on a journey back to the first year of the decade.

Top 10 Films of 2000


10. X-Men
As far as I’m concerned, Brian Singer’s movie is the reason for the popularity of super hero films in the era of CG motion pictures. The first X-Men was full of great effects

9. Requiem for a Dream
This is a cool movie, and one of the most sobering cases against drug use I’ve ever seen. Our characters are stuck in such a horrbile downward spiral, it’s actually pretty hard to watch. But an important cinematic effort.

8. Almost Famous
I assume this is pretty much what it was like being a band before corporations really took control of rock and roll. I’m about it. It’s a lot of fun.

7. Best in Show
Can you believe I saw this in theaters? I guess it’s not that bonkers. But I remember my dad took me to it, and initially I hadn’t wanted to go. I didn’t understand the mockumentary concept. But I did see, and I laughed the whole way through it. Thanks, dad.

6. Croucing Tiger, Hidden Dragon
And so it came to pass that wire fu rose in popularity in motion pictures. For some reason, the Ottenis just can’t like this movie. They have some wacky problem with fantastic martial arts and actors speaking in Chinese. Everyone else, however, is free to enjoy this landmark movie.

5. O Brother, Where art Thou?
As far as I can recall, this was the first Cohens movie I saw. It seemed weird, but I was about it. Nowadays, I’m even more about it.

4. Traffic
Oh, Traffic, you think you’re so cool. You deal with a bunch of realistic modern issues and inspired beloved one word title films like Crash and Babel. But you’re better than those movies, aren’t you?

3. Gladiator
Oh man, how cool was this movie back in the day? Not only a marvel in regard to special effects, but just a damn fun movie to watch. Russel Crowe is the badass Maximus, but I think you’ve really got to give it to Joaquin Phoenix, for playing such a creepy villain. He’s just so easy to hate. Plus, back then, the violence was inspiring for the young me.

2. Memento
What a cool movie. With a fantastic editing job that keeps the viewer just as in the dark as our leading man. It really makes you wonder why Guy Pearce doesn’t get more play these days.

1. High Fidelity
Every time I watch this movie I like it more. The clever asides, the top ten lists, the effective romance, it’s all good. Of course, this was also the breakout role for Jack Black as far as I’m concerned. I love it.

Top 5 Albums of 2000
In a time without iPods, where Napster reigned supreme at the forefront of the Internet music phenomenon, I can’t say I really listened to that many albums. I probably listened to The Essential Bob Dylan and The Beatles 1 more than any contemporary work from that time. I probably should look back in time for stuff that I would enjoy, but since this was a spur of the moment type deal, for this very first feature I’m only going to have a top five. Please forgive me (that’s a reference to that David Gray album that came out in 2000 that I never listened to but became casually aware of later on).


5. Death Cab for Cutie – We Have the Facts and We’re Voting Yes
???

4. Modest Mouse – The Moon and Antarctica
The first Modest Mouse album that I cared about. Everyone’s heard “3rd Planet” and “Gravity Rides Everything,” and there are plenty of other tracks that are just a good. If you haven’t heard it yet, why not check it out? Why read these lists if you’re not going to check out the albums I’m recomending?

3. Coldplay – Parachutes
I think at this point most readers will know that I love this album. So I won’t write about it any more.

2. Radiohead – Kid A
It took me a little while to understand why Kid A is great. I think I sort of get it now. All I really know is that I enjoy hearing the sounds that come from these songs. My peers probably get the technical reasons.

1. U2All That You Can’t Leave Behind
Probably my favorite U2 album of recent years. I totally dig what they’re doing here, especially the first few tracks. I’ve noticed that’s a pattern for me, a lot of albums I’m all about the first few tracks and kind of lose interest at the end. Not that the latter songs on this CD are bad, no, quite the opposite.

Top 10 Video Games of 2000


10. MechWarrior 4: Vengeance
In this game you assemble giant robots and go to war against other robots and puny tanks and that sort of thing. It was awesome.

9. Pokemon Gold/Silver
You know how in the first Pokemon games you walked around, fought gym leaders, put together your dream team, and became a Pokemon master. This is the exact same thing. But the names and locations have all been changed.

8. Perfect Dark
The legendary follow-up to Goldeneye. Now you play as a British lady spy who has to worry about all sorts of crazy bad guys. The whole game was like “remember that other game we made? This is like that. But better. Am I right?” Were they right?

7. Tekken Tag Tournament
My first PS2 game. The Tekken series has always been among my favorites. Tag gameplay, as it turns out, is quite fun. Oh, and there was that bowling minigame. But I think the biggest draw, for me at least, was the crazy graphics. Crazy good.

6. Final Fantasy IX
The first Final Fantasy game I really spent any time on. In fact, the first PS1 game that I bought. Remember when people called the PS1 the PSX? What was up with that? Too bad that’s taken, now they can’t go all Roman when the PlayStation 10 comes out.

5. Diablo II
Yeah! Um, I haven’t really spent much time with this PC classic, which is why it’s so far back on this list. Basically you click around to move and then click on bad guys and eventually they die. This game is all about the loot, but the loot is so good! Loot lust baby.

4. Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 2
Manuals! Oh, sweet manuals. Suddenly the combo became a much more spectacular feat in this followup to the breakout original. Now, if you ask me the series really hit its pique with the third title, but God knows this game seemed pretty hard to beat back in 2000.

3. The Legend of Zelda: Majora’s Mask
The followup to arguably the greatest game of the 3D age had a lot to live up to, and mostly succeeded. Majora’s Mask followed Young Link’s three day quest to save the world from the grimacing moon that was on a crash-course with whatever city the game was set in. With the interesting mask gameplay and tons of epic moments, this is a game that really sticks with you.

2. Marvel vs. Capcom 2: New Age of Heroes
Among my favorite fighting games ever made. A crazy huge cast of Capcom super stars and the legendary Marvel super heroes duke it out in teams of three. There’s not much to say, this is simply one of the most fun games I ever played.

1. The Sims
Easily the most innovative game of the year. The Sims is a wonderfully genius game, tasking players to create a house and the people within it, and guide them through their day-to-day lives. Who would have guessed that you could make a compelling game out of life! While sure, the most fun came from killing your characters in sadistic ways, no one could deny this certainly is one of the most influential games in recent years.

That’s How Easy Love Can Be


We got our first peak at the upcoming PSP iteration of the Rock Band series and I’ve got to admit I’m pumped. Rock Band Unplugged looks like a new version of Harmonix classics Frequency and Amplitude, but with that Rock Band look on top of it. Which sounds awesome. I mean, it would be crazy to try to come up with a stupid guitar peripheral for a handheld.

If you never got to play those older games, here’s how it works: There are a bunch of tracks scrolling at you, one for each instrument. It’s your job to hit all the notes for a section, which will then clear that track for a while. You’ve got to keep all the tracks going so you can hear the entire song.

They’ve announced that the game will have 40 master recordings on disc, plus the ability to buy more tracks on the PSP store. I think I also read that the new songs would come out as Rock Band DLC eventually. Here are the songs announced so far:

“ABC” by The Jackson Five
“Alive” by Pearl Jam
“Buddy Holly” by Weezer
“Everlong” by Foo Fighters
“Float On” by Modest Mouse
“Gasoline” by Audioslave
“Kryptonite” by 3 Doors Down
“Less Talk More Rokk” by Freezepop
“Livin’ on a Prayer” by Bon Jovi
“Message in a Bottle” by The Police
“Miss Murder” by AFI
“More Than a Feeling” by Boston
“Pinball Wizard” by The Who
“Rock Your Socks” by Tenacious D
“Show Me the Way” by BlackTide
“What’s My Age Again?” by Blink-182
“White Wedding, Part 1” by Billy Idol
“Would” by Alice in Chains

It was also announced today that Sony would be coming out with a new PSP/Rock Band Unplugged package, so those of you without that console can scoop up everything you need in one box. I assume it comes with one of those fancy new PSP-3000s. Look for the set and the game alone in stores June 9.